Goal for the Day: Deal With Toxic People

Toxic people have been around for centuries.

The word “toxic” has now been assigned to people. At first, the combination of words seems a little startling. However, if you think about it, it’s an apt phrase. Many people we encounter on a daily basis are toxic—they cause damage to us. They can hurt our feelings, and affect our health and well-being by fostering emotional and physical fatigue and stress. Many sources tell us to rid ourselves of toxic people. While that’s a great idea, sometimes it’s not possible. What about the disagreeable people we work with? What about the people who we are forever linked to for one reason or another? Sometimes, you can’t get rid of a person who is hurtful for many reasons.


You’ll never be able to change someone who is toxic. However, you can change the way you deal with them. The first step is to recognize that their anger, damage and dysfunction are their problem, not yours. They are acting out of their own pain. But, that doesn’t mean that they have to contribute to your pain. When someone who is aggressively negative is railing at you, simply take what they say with a grain of salt. Don’t protest, don’t argue—that just feeds them and makes it worse. The best response is to be nonresponsive. Offer nothing more than you have to, finish the conversation, and move on. By doing that, you’re taking away any power that they have over you. Remember, you can’t control other people, but you can control how you react to them.