Punch's Cousin, Chapter 79

Iolanthe Evangeline howled as Barbara Allen removed her cloak. “Careful, girl!”


“I am trying to assist you, Miss Evangeline.” Barbara answered. She looked to Ulrika. “Help me, then.”

“Who are you to give me orders?” Ulrika spat.

“Do as she said!” The professor barked.

“Really, aren’t you forceful?” Ulrika cooed.

“Not now, woman, do as she said!” The professor said gruffly.

Ulrika bent over Iolanthe’s body and started to remove her long gloves.

“No!” Iolanthe cried. “Leave them.”

“Miss Evangeline, you’ve been shot. We need to see how badly you’ve been hurt.” Barbara argued.

“I’ve not been shot in my hands. I’m wounded in my shoulder.” Iolanthe screamed.

“You must keep your voice down.” Barbara whispered. “You don’t want them to hear you in the house.”

“I don’t care who hears me and I don’t want you thinkin’ that I do!” Iolanthe bellowed frantically.

“I know who you are.” Ulrika grinned. “You’re the murderous madam.”

“Unless you’re seeking employment at my establishment, you’d best keep yourself quiet, you flame-haired witch.” Iolanthe growled at Ulrika.

“I don’t need to have a place at your bawdy house,” Ulrika laughed. “I do quite well on my own.” She winked at Arthur.

“Help me undo her bodice.” Barbara ordered Ulrika. “You men look away.”

The professor laughed. “You think it’s the first time I’ve seen this woman’s skin?”

“Modesty is not my calling.” Iolanthe moaned.

“Now, this may hurt.” Barbara said, pressing on Iolanthe’s exposed wound.

Iolanthe screamed.

“There’s nothing embedded in your flesh.” Barbara said. “It seems to have gone through you.” She whispered to Arthur who stood nearby. “I don’t know what to do. She’s bleeding quite a lot.”

“Staunch the bleeding,” Arthur mumbled.

“With what?” Barbara asked nervously.

“I’ll get some spider webs to pack it.” Arthur answered.

“No, you won’t.” The professor said menacingly. “Dead men can’t collect no spider webs.”

Arthur’s eyes widened.

“Let the ginger wench do it.” The professor continued.

“I will not.” Ulrika answered, challengingly.

“You’ll do as I say or there’ll be two of ya bleedin’ ta death in this place.” The professor barked.

“Why don’t you come with me?” Ulrika said deeply.

“You are a tart.” The professor shook his head. “Do as you’re told.”

Ulrika frowned, but retreated to find something to stop the bleeding.

“As for you, Arthur, what’s it like being unswallowed by your watery grave?” The professor asked.

“I meant to let you know that I was unharmed.” Arthur stammered.

“Did you?” The professor grinned. “All them days on the ship when we was lookin’ for ya, and you just forgot to let me know you’d not drowned?”

“I…I…wasn’t in my right head.” Arthur stuttered.

“I’d say not.” The professor laughed cruelly. “Otherwise, you’d have remembered that you and I had a bargain. Thought we were working as a team. You wouldn’t have tried to betray me, would ya? I’m not one to be betrayed.”

“We can work something out.” Arthur said nervously. “I’m sure we can.”

“Stop it!” Barbara shouted. “Both of you. You can argue later. Now we need to ensure Miss Evangeline’s survival!”

“Let the boys play their games.” Iolanthe laughed hollowly. “It’s gonna take more than this to stop me.” She winced in pain.

“Who do this to you?” Barbara asked.

“That Englishman. The one that took Adrienne from me.” Iolanthe groaned. “The pain he’s caused me will not go unpunished. No, I’ll return it to him in spades.”

At that very moment, Naasir was helping Mr. Punch with Julian’s coat.

“Do be careful,” Robert sighed. “Remember your hand.” He coughed and wiped his mouth. “I just don’t think this is the right time for this.”

“Chum, there’s never goin’ to be a better time.” Mr. Punch shrugged. “Marjani and Naasir say that Barbara and Arthur are in the stables. Now’s the time to give them this powder, it is. The sooner we can make them speak the truth, the sooner we can all be safe. Then, we can go back to London and be free of all this what’s troublin’ us.”

“Naasir, you will keep careful watch on him. Won’t you?” Robert asked.

“I will, Dr. Halifax.” Naasir nodded.

“What about Ulrika?” Robert asked nervously. “You said she’s there, too. She’s not one to be trifled with. She’s too keen.”

“I’ll distract her, Sir.” Marjani said. “I’ll tell her that her mother done called for her and that she must get back to the house right away.”

Robert grunted. “I don’t like this.”

“Robert, let them do what they feel they must.” Cecil interrupted, rubbing his twisted ankle.

“And what about you?” Robert asked frantically. “How will you return home with that ankle?”

“I’ll make my way.” Cecil said firmly. “Naasir can help me back when he returns. Until then, I’ll stay here with you.”

“I simply don’t like this.” Robert repeated.

Mr. Punch placed Julian’s uninjured hand on Robert’s shoulder. ‘Here, Chum, I ain’t goin’ to do nothin’ that’ll make this worse. You can trust me, you can.”

“I do trust you, Punch.” Robert nodded. “It’s the people in that stable whom I don’t trust.”

“Won’t take but a few minutes.” Mr. Punch smiled. “Listen, you just talk to your brother for a wee bit longer. Before you know it, we’ll be back.” He looked to Naasir and Marjani. “Come on, then, let’s go.”

“Don’t worry, Sir,” Marjani smiled gently at Robert. “I’ll keep ‘em safe. We got powerful good on our side.”

Robert shook his head. “I pray this goes quickly.”

Marjani, Naasir and Mr. Punch hurried out of the house and made sure to walk in the shadows. They were startled by a wild voice from the shrubbery.

“Hey.” A man’s voice called.

“It’s my brother.” Naasir said. “Cephas, why are you here? I’ve already explained that I won’t go with you.”

“Didn’t come for you!” Cephas answered angrily. “Came for Marjani. We got trouble.”

“What kind of trouble?” Marjani asked.

“Your girl and her husband—they got sick.” Cephas said.

“Sick? How sick?” Marjani’s eyes widened.

“Don’t know.” Cephas shrugged. “All I know is that they’re burnin’ up.”

“What about the baby? What about Columbia?” Marjani asked frantically.

“She’s not sick. Brought her to another cabin.” Cephas answered. “You gotta come with me now.”

“Go on,” Naasir nodded. “The Great Man and I will soldier onward.”

“You sure?” Marjani asked.

“Go.” Naasir responded.

“I’ll return.” Marjani said quickly before rushing off with Cephas.

“Just us, then.” Mr. Punch grunted.

“We can do it.” Naasir said supportively.

They made their way to the stables and crouched below one of the windows. Mr. Punch slowly raised his head and looked inside.

“Here, they ain’t alone.” Mr. Punch whispered.

“Miss Ulrika is with them still?”

“No.” Mr. Punch answered. “It’s another lady—in the hay—can’t see her face. She’s got dark hair.”

“That isn’t Miss Ulrika.” Naasir trembled, smelling the air.

“No.” Ulrika said from behind them. “Miss Ulrika is here.”

Punch howled.

“Don’t be frightened, you handsome lunatic.” Ulrika grinned. “Why don’t you come inside and join our little party?”



Did you miss Chapters 1-78? If so, you can read them here.