Mr. Punch Recounts Thanksgiving

Coo! You Americans know how to eat, you do. And, you know how to celebrate. See, this was me first Thanksgiving, if you will. See, I only been in this country a few months, and I didn’t know there was such a thing as Thanksgiving.

Don’t know what it is, ‘xactly, I don’t. Something ‘bout people with buckles on their hats standing on rocks and eatin’ turkeys. But, I’m guessin’ that the most ‘portant part ‘bout it is bein’ with your family and friends and bein’ thankful for all the good things what you got.

And, to be sure, I got things what I’m thankful for, too, I do. I got a nice house to live in and me Bertie Dog to keep me company. Then, there’s me professor who’s a nice enough bloke even if he doesn’t sit down for very long and always seems to be doin’ something what ain’t what I want to do.

So, let me tell ya ‘bout me first Thanksgivin’. Seems that most folks in this country spend most of their time in the kitchen makin’ food what’s gonna be to eat only not ‘til the next day.

First thing is that I saw that me professor’s mum made all sort of lovely things. Biscuits (not what you folk call cookies, but actual fluffy biscuits) and bread, and then, there were pies and them little cakes what you call cookies.

The cookies, see, they were shaped liked pumpkins and turkeys and were decorated with icing and looked ever-so pretty, they did. They was sugar cookies and they tastes, I’m told—since me mouth don’t open—nice and soft and wonderful. Then, there was pies. Pies made of pumpkin. Pies made of pecans and bourbon and chocolate chips. These are what’s called Derby pies. Me professors mum makes them for me professor since he don’t like pumpkin so very much. And, not, only where there big pies, but little ones what looked like wee tarts.

And, then, there was all sorts of other food. First, there was a fine soup made from butternut squash and pears which were served with mustard-sour cream and candied nuts. Then, a big turkey what was cooked to look like mahogany. The turkey was almost as big as the Bertie Dog. Then, there were this stuff called dressing what’s made of cornbread and white bread and sausage and onions and celery. Coo! If only I could taste and smell.

But, there were more. Potatoes mashed with parsnips. And, green beans with shallots and maple-glazed nuts. And cranberry and apricot compote what me professor’s mum made. Everyone ate and ate and ate, they did. Even Bertie did. And, everyone were happy and peaceful, they were, and it were good.

Now, I hear it’s time for Christmas. I know about Christmas, I do. I’m curious to see what an American Christmas is like. I bet there’s lots o’ eatin’ to be done.

Me professor is on a ladder right now, puttin’ lights on a big tree. That’s a good sign. That’s what I’m writing for ya today. He’ll be back tomorrow with all the usual stuff. Until then…

Clubs and hisses…

Mr. Punch