A Recipe for Punch, Chapter 85

Chapter 85
They Will Try


"Quiet down,"  Georgie shushed William as the latter let out a terrified scream.  "And, cover yourself, for God's sake."

"It's nothing, I've not s...seen before."  Morgana blushed.  "The men in the traveling show were...were...less than modest."

"Still, Miss Morgana."  George shook his head, wrapping the rough blanket that Mr. Quick had given him around himself.  He groggily covered William with the other blanket.  

Whatever elixir Quick and Causer had administered them caused George's head to pound and filled his mouth with bitter cotton.  

"Where are we?"  William slurred, thrashing about on the cold, dirt floor of the cavern where they'd been deposited.  He pulled the blanket around his naked body, but it did little to warm him.  He felt damp to the bone and his skin was slick.  He ran his hand over his nude leg.  "What is this all...all over me?"

"I think we've been coated with butter or lard."  George replied.

William gagged.  "Why?  Are they going to eat us?  Dear, God!"

"Shhhhh...."  George warned the young man.

"They're not going to eat you,"  Morgana replied plainly.  "They want to keep your skin soft."  

"Whatever for?"  William moaned.

"Never mind about it now, lad."  Morgana said softly.

"Do you know, Miss?"  William asked.

"I have an idea."  Morgana nodded.

"Tell me, then!"  William shouted.  He regretted it.  The echo of his own voice made his head pound.

"For God's sake, man."  George growled.  "Be quiet."  He grabbed his own forehead.  "They've put us in here for a reason.  Cor!  You're a fool, you are!  Do you really want them to come back for us so quickly?"

"Why?"  William whispered.  "Why are we in here?  Where are we?  What's happened?  The last I recall I was bringing breakfast to Miss Morgana.  Mr. Causer came in and there was a struggle.  He was grabbing for Miss Morgana and...and...she tried to fight him off and...she cut him with her...uhhh...hands."

"That's kind of you."  Morgana nodded.  "But, they're not hands.  You were very brave to try to help me, William.  I'm terribly sorry that it ended up this way for you."

"Whatever would Mr. Causer want with Miss Morgana?"  William asked frantically.  "Or me?  Or you?"

"Would you please be quiet?"  George snapped.  "Never before have I met a man who went on as you do.  Just be quiet and let me think."

"Think?"  William barked.  "We're in some kind of cave--naked as when we were born.  Trapped and covered in grease.  Only Miss Morgana has her clothing, and she's a lady who, forgive me, has no hands.  We have been given some kind of potion.  We're weak and the three of us are at some great disadvantage.  We are going to die in here.  And, for what?"

"You really don't understand?"  George growled.  "Look at Miss Morgana.  Look at her face!  I know you never really worked for the duchess, but they could be twins.  You know that the duchess' corpse was found in the house.  You know how devoted the lot o' 'em are here.  I heard 'em talkin', William.  I heard 'em say how they want to bring 'er back to life.  We three are the parts they're gonna use."

"That's...that's mad!"  William gasped.

"They're mad."  Morgana nodded casually.

"It's impossible!"  William hugged himself.  

"Nonetheless,"  Morgana sighed, "they...they will try."

"How can you be so calm, Miss?"  William rattled.  

"Lad, when you spend most of your life in a Curiosities Show, you learn how to keep your wits about you."  Morgana replied.  She held up a pincer and snapped it at William.  "Furthermore, though I may be skittish, I'm  not as helpless as I look.  Now, listen to young George and do try to settle down.  And, and...do please close your blanket.  I've seen many things, but, try to remember that I am a lady."

She snapped her pincer again.

William wrapped his blanket more tightly around his body.

"Miss Morgana, do you know what this place is?"  George asked.

"Not exactly."  Morgana shook her head.  "I rather thought it some...some kind of cellar, at first.  But, it's more like a...tunnel."  She pointed to the trapdoor through which they'd been lowered when Mr. Hargrave and Mr. Causer made such a fuss about hiding them.  "There's the way down, but, I listened to them as they lowered us.  It seems, there's also a way through.  Causer spoke of a way to another place.  I kept my eyes shut.  They thought I was still under the spell of that tonic.  They spoke of the way to some woman's house--someone called Lottie."

"Lottie?"  George's eyes widened.

"Do you know the name?"

"She's the woman..."  He paused.  "It was to her home that I was taken last night."

"She runs the notch house."  William scoffed.

"Ah."  Morgana nodded.  "Well, then...this...this is one way to it."  She looked around.  "Somehow."   She smiled slightly.  "Interesting that a tunnel from the vicarage should lead to a bawdy house."

"But, I don't see a  way out of here."  William looked around.

"Blanket."  Morgana snapped her pincers.

William blushed again.

"Nothing worth finding is obvious."  Morgana continued.

"You can't find something that isn't there."  William moaned.

"Do you want to stay here and be flayed so your buttered skin can make a coat for my half-sister's corpse?"  Morgana asked plainly.

"No?"  William whispered.

"Then...then look for a way out."  Morgana replied.



Did you miss Chapters 1-84 of A Recipe for Punch?  If so, you can read them here.  Come back tomorrow for Chapter 86.

Mr. Punch of Belgrave Square, Chapter 85

Chapter 85: 

Comfort 



Finlay didn’t knock when he entered Ellen’s room. The intrusion caused the governess to gasp, closing the Duchess’ journal quickly and grasping it to her bosom.

Finlay grinned at his half-sister. “Startle ya, lassie?”

“What do you think you’re doing, then?” Ellen snapped as Finlay shut the door. She put the journal down next to herself on the bed.

Holding up a silver bowl of grapes, Finlay winked. “I brought ya some comfort. Your Mrs. Pepper, with the Duke’s permission, sent one of the girls to the village to fetch these for ya, my dear. It’s from all yer friends downstairs.”

Ellen chuckled.

“I volunteered to bring them to the poor, sick governess. After all, I’m so sturdy and strong. No fever could get to me.”

“Oh, yes, Finlay. You’re the picture of masculinity.”

“Some think so.” Finlay winked again.

“Does the mad Duke?”

Finlay shrugged, sitting on the edge of Ellen’s bed.

“Get up!” Ellen barked. “What if someone were to come in and see you sitting here?”

“Sister, dear.” Finlay growled. “There’s not a soul in this house who would think I meant anything untoward to you.”

“Maybe so.” Ellen sniffed. “But, it’s not proper.”

“You’re suddenly worried about being proper?” Finlay laughed, standing up. “Oh, you are a fine one to talk, lassie. Were you so concerned ‘bout propriety when you were wakin’ up next to the Baron Lensdown?”

“About as concerned as you were when you awoke in the bed of the Earl of Clophworth.”

“I never fell asleep, so how could I wake up?” Finlay smiled.

“I’m not as interested in your former conquests, Finlay, as I am about your present amorous adventures. Has the Duke noticed you?”

“No.” Finlay sighed. “He only has eyes for the doctor. Frankly, I can see why.”

“You’ve not been trying, then.” Ellen frowned.

“I certainly have.” Finlay retorted. “He’s either very loyal to his middle class companion or he’s too daft to know when he’s been presented with an easy opportunity.”

“How have you approached him?” Ellen asked.

“With my usual charm.” Finlay grinned.

“He doesn’t respond to charm. The man is guileless. He only reacts favorably to obvious truths and, often, nostalgia and innocence. Have you reminded him that you used to watch him when you were both boys here? Have you suggested that you’ve fancied him for many years? There’s a certain attractiveness to the idea that all those years ago, you—an older, handsome boy—found him appealing.”

“I’ll try it.” Finlay replied aloofly. “There’s a truth to it. I did used to fancy him. When he was a young man of sixteen and I was twenty, I’d follow him around. I don’t think he ever noticed it. I don’t think he ever noticed anything. There were days when he was visiting here with Sir Colin when he didn’t come out of his rooms. Sometimes, when he did, he had such a blank expression that it was if his body was being propelled by another being altogether. Those were the days when he’d spirit himself away to the tower. He’s just stand up there and look out at the estate. Even as a small child. Several times, I tried to engage him in play. He didn’t seem to understand. I thought, at first, that he was being snobbish—not wishing to be involved with the son of the groundsman, but I soon realized that he was utterly unaware of anything outside of himself. I always rather pitied the lad.”

“And, that, Finlay, is exactly what you should say to him.”

“Oh?” Finlay laughed. “I’m sure that’ll charm him. ‘Your Grace, when we were both lads, I noticed, even then, that you were barmy.’ No doubt, he’ll fall into my arms in appreciation.”

“No, no.” Ellen shook her head. “You should seem as if you’re troubled. And, when he asks—and he will--you should tell him that it’s difficult to be different. I’ll wager that he’ll very quickly try to comfort you, telling you how he, too, is different and that it’s possible to be happy. He’ll wish to protect you. It’s his weakness. He can’t help himself. With that, you will be introduced to ‘Mr. Punch’ and he’ll begin to relax his guard. That’s how I did it.”

“There’s a difference, lass, between wishing to protect me and wanting to…”

“Not necessarily.” Ellen snorted.

“He’s utterly devoted to the doctor.”

“Fine, then.” Ellen scowled. “If that fails, work on the doctor. He’s quick to anger—a sure sign of passion.”

“You’re full of ideas, dearie, but not so full of practical knowledge. The two of them are always together-except when they’re dressing, and, then, either Charles or Gerard is with them.”

“I’ve told you how to get by that.”

“And, I’ve tried.” Finlay said. “But, just as loyal as the two lovers are to one another, their men are equally steadfast. Neither Charles nor Gerard would ever miss a chance to serve their masters.”

“Gerard is a drunk.”

“Reformed, my dear.” Finlay shook his head. “I attempted it.”

“That African fool has told me—out of her deep concern—that her dear Gerard had tried to become intoxicated off of medication which the doctor had given to Charles. If you can’t get him to take a drink, try medicating him.”

“How, exactly, should I do that?”

Ellen’s eyes widened with delight. “The only time that I can recall Charles or Gerard ever missing a moment with their masters was when they were injured. Charles missed a day when he broke his wrist and Gerard did as well when he’d been struck in the head. Should they both be injured, Charles would be unable to attend the Duke and Gerard would have a need for the medication which he seems to enjoy so much. Then, you could have access to both of the masters.”

“How do you suggest that they’re both injured?” Finlay squinted.

Ellen smiled. “The Servants’ Ball…is it still planned for next week?”

“I imagine so. The Duke will finalize the plans for it this afternoon when he speaks with Mrs. North and Mr. Speaight.”

“There’s your opportunity.” Ellen nodded.

“How so?” Finlay asked.

“Leave that to me.” Ellen grinned. “Now, get out of here before you’re missed. Come back tonight after everyone’s gone to bed. I’ll have your answer for you. In the meantime, try your best to get closer to the Duke.”

“I’ve been told that I’m to serve tea with Speaight this afternoon.” Finlay boasted. “Instead of Charles and Gerard. It seems the master wish to give me a chance, and to make me realize that I’m respected.”

“Good.” Ellen nodded. “Do as I instructed.”

“You’re not very polite for a governess.”

“And, you’re not very honest for a footman.”

“I suppose it’s family tradition.” Finlay chuckled.

“To hell with family tradition, Finlay.” Ellen answered. “It’s sheer necessity.”



Did you miss Chapters 1-84 of Mr. Punch of Belgrave Square? If so, you can read them here. Come back tomorrow for Chapter 86.

Punch's Cousin, Chapter 85

Julian shuddered. “I’m thankful that she’s alive.”


“Do you wish to see her?” Adrienne asked softly.

“Yes.” Julian nodded.

“Julian,” Robert shook his head. “I don’t know…”

“She is my sister, Robert.” Julian replied gently. “If you and Cecil were quarreling, I still think you’d wish to continue to help him regardless of how you were feeling.”

Robert paused for a moment and coughed softly. “You’re correct. I would.”

“I’ll bring her up,” Adrienne said.

“Julian, I just wish to caution you.” Robert said, “I don’t want you to become overexcited. You need to be resting comfortably so you may recover. I’m merely concerned that Barbara is coming here to try to manipulate you.”

“I’m sure she is.” Julian smiled. “However, perhaps I can convince her to return home and leave this misguided life that she’s chosen. I am not without hope that everything can be restored.”

“You continue to amaze me,” Robert smiled. “Perhaps you’re correct.”

Adrienne showed Barbara into the room.

“Shall I leave you?” Adrienne asked.

“No,” Barbara spoke up. “Please, stay. I know that I don’t deserve your compassion, however, I think you can help me, Mrs. Halifax. You know the treachery of that monster—Iolanthe Evageline. You know how easily a young woman can be seduced into her world of debauchery. You managed to escape. I can only hope that you’ll help me escape, too.”

“I would like to.” Adrienne nodded, “If you’ll allow me to.”

“Please.” Barbara said, trying desperately to keep the falseness from being evident in her voice. “And, you, Dr. Halifax. I owe you the most sincere of apologies. You see, I’ve judged you unfairly. Perhaps it’s because I associate you with a trying and shameful time of my life. However, I know that you were doing your duty when you…attended to me. For that, I should be grateful. Can you forgive me?”

Robert looked at Barbara suspiciously. “I can forgive anyone who apologizes sincerely.”

“Oh, I am sincere.” Barbara gushed.

“No, you ain’t!” The words flew from Julian’s mouth.

Robert and Adrienne grinned at Mr. Punch’s reappearance.

“Oh, Julian, you’re doing your little pantomime. How sweet.” Barbara said, drawing in a deep breath.

“You know well as I do that this ain’t a pantomime, Barbara. I’m a person what’s got a voice of me own, too. And, I’ve got a few matters what I’d like to talk ‘bout with you.” Mr. Punch sat up angrily.

Meanwhile, Arthur wandered slowly toward the deep, murky red water of the swamp at the base of the hill.

“Well, you’ve taken your time, haven’t you?” Ulrika cooed from behind a bank of trees.

“What is this place?” Arthur sniffed.

“They call it the Bayou Vin Atténué.” Ulrika grinned. “Isn’t it glorious, really?”

“It smells foul.” Arthur frowned.

“You must experience it with your other senses.” Ulrika said. “Stop being so common. Look around you—look at the crimson water. That soil from La Colline Cramoisie has bled into this bayou for a century. It’s the color of gem stones from the orient. That’s our trade, you know. Gem stones.”

“Thought you people grew sugar cane.” Arthur grunted.

“Oh, we do, but Father is exploring the gem trade. I do believe that we’ll be quite successful at it. The Rittenhouse Mining Company! Can you imagine?”

“Them that’s got the most always gets the most.” Arthur sighed.

“You can have it, too, Arthur.” Ulrika grinned devilishly. “I can introduce you to the world you’ve only been a part of as a servant. Artists, beauty, galas, riches beyond your wildest dreams!”

“Sure, you can.” Arthur laughed. “No, let’s stop this foolishness and get about doin’ what you asked me here for.”

“Arthur, it can be so much more.” Ulrika embraced the man.

“Right. Don’t forget, Pet, that I’m married to a woman who’s got access to a lot more than your family ever got.”

“Does she?” Ulrika batted her eyelashes. “From what I can see she’s a fallen woman and a servant. One doesn’t usually associate that with an elegant lifestyle.”

“We’ll get what’s due us.” Arthur chuckled.

“Not without the diamond.” Ulrika smiled. “The diamond that I hid for Barbara in the stables.”

“We’ll find it. Once they clear away that rubble, we’ll find where you buried it.” Arthur shook his head. “Even if you don’t tell us. And, once we get that beauty to Iolanthe Evangeline, Barbara and me will start our grand life together, we will.”

“You’ll never find it.” Ulrika laughed cruelly. “Because I already have it.”

“It ain’t yours to keep.” Arthur grabbed Ulrika by the wrists.

“Nor is it yours,” Ulrika squealed. “But it can be.”

“How?” Arthur spat.

“You just have to do one little task for me.”



Did you miss Chapters 1-84? If so, you can read them here.